Why i PREFER LA to San Francisco

This comes from someone who made a film called Hell (A) (about LA being, er, hellish...), so I advise the reader to use discernment. Cela dit ...

- LA is possibly one of the most multi-cultural cities in the world. Mulatto is the majority; it is beautiful, it is everywhere and it is the future. SF is diverse yet segregated, and in its central districts, white.
- LA has CHARM, contrary to popular belief. It is an all-American charm; made of dreams for dreamers. It is the life at the end of Death Valley. If you travel WEST, you arrive in LA, that’s the rule. And you are escaping the EAST, which is cold, cramped and full of bankers, or some other repressive regime.
- Fine, read ‘LOSER’ for ‘dreamer.’ BUT it’s kind of OKAY to be a loser in LA. Most Angelinos are interesting misfits who have come from all-hither. Being a loser gets you kudos. And anyway dude, you’re so going to make it, like tomorrow.
- Within the States, LA is universally detested. Is that a negative?
- Nobody walks in LA. Which admittedly is BAD for pollution, but it does cut down on NOISE POLLUTION! The majority of idiotic, mind-bending conversations are thankfully contained within the four doors of a black hybrid. In SF these conversations occur less frequently, but they happen on the street.
- Surpisingly, as a part-time cylist I find it safer to trot the twenty miles to the supermarket in LA, than the two miles in SF. The roads are wider, and there are far fewer of us competing for the mini lane!
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- In San Francisco, there is only so much freezing sunshine you can enjoy in May. I’ve heard it gets colder! LA is hot, straight down the line.
- San Francisco has charm, but it is a borrowed charm. Borrowed from the Victorians, the Irish, the Italians, the Chinese, the Japanese, et al. So WHAT IS IT?
- It’s not OKAY to be a loser in SF. You live in the Golden Gate Park, smoke cheap weed and wear clothes last washed in 1973. It’s OKAY on the other hand to be a yuppy (entrepreneur), très 1980s. Or work for a not-for-profit, which unfortunately means you will be poor.
- Anecdotal prejucice. Since living in SF, I have suffered two feverish hallucinogenic trips. I’ve honestly no idea what triggered these trips; as far as I know it could have been the tap water in my apartment! In the last one, I travelled to the edge of space at warp 15. It was scary...

Oh, what noble mind is here o'erthrown! I'm an eternal malcontent. With this post, I return to the Old Country for the rest of year. American Airlines – please deliver me to a mid-Atlantic island, like in 'Lost.' Adieu Amerique, I will actually miss you.

But I’ll be back.